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welcome to my nightly journeys.

i will just summarize this long heavy nightmare. the most horrible nightmare i had in a long row of nigthmares.
it involved a secret place, were 'WE' gathered to discuss the matters, the secret place was a rollercoaster-like amusementpark-highlight.
the city, everything was situated in, was berlin-babylon.
to let this overcrowded, dirty, shiny city survive, they had to sacrifice a human being every night.
the person, they sacrificed every night was Gustave, a vampire, who came back to life every night after being torn apart by a monster deep in a black cave-lake.
gustave looked bleached, but everytime he came back from the water, he looked like munch's scream + blue + extremely scary. or like one of THE RING victems...
the monster wasnt too stupid, they needed a new sacrifice. guess who... the most evil person in all my dreams and when i recognized him, i knew, that the city would fall. he had a name... also gustave or sebastian or jerome. one of those three. he was breeding (yepp. breeding) dutch stillives in his iron-barred cell. there where spiders all around the narrow walls. (like dungeon walls... though the hiding-place was deep in a 5stars-hotel)
he was living in a room hidden behind a classical david oilpainting while gustave hid behind a rembrandt...
there was a rush to the departing train. my sister had a broken leg and her crutch got into the wheels of the train. she vanished and came back severly injured and just smiled and was happy SHE GOT THE FUCKING TRAIN.
there was water. there was loss, spiders, the monster-angel-kid, there was a departing train, a narrow white street, the feeling of falling, sexual assault and freakin from-under-the-water views... gustave was so dangerously insane... and all those people were sickenly bored... they didnt understand the sacrifice.
"Wirst du wirklich an Gustaves Stelle treten?"
Der kleine Junge spielte an einem Stillleben aus Weintrauben, Walln?ssen und einem Tiersch?del. "Das Licht ist falsch, ich wei?", antwortete er l?chelnd.

And in the end... i knew, it was this disturbed boy, who was the monster under the city... and if he was let loose...

i am so extremely affraid. but maybe, its the time again... 5am.


i havent been painting stilllives in a long time...
22.4.05 05:27





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